Ho? Ho? Or Ho?

It's a quiet, enchanting surprise gift without much glam but a whole lot of heart … the kind of piece you hesitate to throw away, which is direct-mail pure gold.

The poem is too long to reproduce here, and there are several versions of it in circulation, but it's worth chasing down. Google it and check out snopes.com's description of how it went old-school viral in 1986 back when Cpl. Schmidt wrote it, on the cusp of the birth of the first commercial Internet service providers.